I’m trying hard to not be bitter

by Veronica Foale on December 17, 2010

in Family, Me, Navelgazing

Writing is cathartic for me and sometimes, I need to write things out before my head explodes from the words and the hurt going around and around and around.

Sometimes though, once I’ve written them and gotten some feedback, it’s better. The words stop and the insanity stops and I can shake off the hurt and move forward again.

This time, I don’t need to leave the post up. I’ve got no real need to sit and wait for the vitriolic emails to appear in my inbox. And don’t doubt me here, I know they’d appear. This is the Internet and I’ve always known my writing could be found by everybody.

My family is difficult and nuanced and complicated. They are annoying and forgetful and biased. Even when I don’t like them very much, I still love them. I suspect they’re very much like every other family out there.

The people who need to know how I feel already do and the people who made me feel that way in the first place, well, I’m doubting that a shitfest will make me feel better.

I suspect my twitter stream has more spies than Russia and I am fine with that. My twitter stream is not private, in any way shape or form. If my highschool principal was so inclined, he could read what I was up to. In real life, I am intensely introverted. My blog and writing help to combat that and keep me balanced.

So really, this is just me saying that while I don’t feel better as such, I’m not letting it hurt anymore and I’m walking away.

Frogpondsrock December 17, 2010 at 7:47 pm

Onwards and upwards sweety.

Marylin December 17, 2010 at 8:22 pm

*hugs* x

Dannie December 17, 2010 at 10:36 pm

((( HUGS)))) V xxxx

Miss Ash December 18, 2010 at 6:46 am

You’ll tire of it sooner than later. There are folks we get to choose in our lives. And those we didn’t choose, well, they fade away.

Watershedd December 18, 2010 at 9:43 am

Just starting to find my feet in the land of Tweets, I’m oblivious, but Iget the concept of writing things out. I do int myself. It started as just letters or a diary (for many of us, that’s what a blog is, isn’t it?), but in the last few years, writing poetry and stories – ficiont and faction has been a better outlet. There’s one letter that I wrote over months and never sent. It allowed be to recognise all teh feelings and hurt and resentment. It’s almost time to burn that one. there’s nothing more to add and I feel good about it all now.

Achelois December 18, 2010 at 12:40 pm

gentle virtual hug

Being Me at Sunny Side Up December 18, 2010 at 2:18 pm

Wise. I empathise more than you may know. xx

Torkona December 29, 2010 at 10:14 pm

I’d love to spy on you through twitter šŸ™‚ although i cant find a link from yur blog to twitter.

oh no, i found it, ignore this post šŸ™‚

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