‘That must be so hard’ they say, when I talk about daily life for us. The meltdowns, the screaming, the sensory overloads.
It must be hard.
And I think about it and well, maybe it is a little. But hard is relative and what’s hard for you, isn’t hard for me. This is daily life and I’m drawing on a wealth of experience and it’s not so bad.
Hard for me, is death and grief.
Not life.
My body falls apart and we add yet another diagnosis to my long string of them. A diagnosis that is ‘broken’ when all is said and done.
Maybe this is a little bit hard.
Maybe not. Maybe I’m just overwhelmed right now.
I created life. I gestated it and felt my body swell under my hands. When the time came, I panted and strained and gave birth to life, to a small human being who may just grow up to rule the world. We don’t know yet, life is full of infinite possibility.
I am God for these lives I created and expelled out into the world, the lives that makes mine so infinitely complicated. If I gave birth to them, I know that I am strong enough to mother them and bring them to adulthood.
This is not hard. This is a privilege.
Comments
10 responses to “Hard is relative”
Oh I so know where you’re coming from sweety. Hard is definitely relative. Your hard and my hard are similar in some ways, but oh so different in others. That doesn’t mean either of us cope better or worse than the other. We do what we have to. We keep putting one foot in front of the other, hold our heads high, and look for those silver linings. What else can we do?
Oh so beautifully put.
it is a privilege you are right.
a hard privilege.
Very relative indeed. There’s a saying that God doesn’t give us anything we cannot handle. Perhaps that’s why you have your life and we all have ours.
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This is beautiful. Just beautiful. xx
Hard is different for each of us. Beautifully said hon
I wholeheartedly agree.
No matter how exhausting my husband and I find parenting, grieving for our firstborn was a million times harder.
You are so, so right about this.
[…] it’s hard, even when I declare that hard is relative, sometimes I have to take a step back and remember, it’s okay to be finding this […]