The day after our dog is hit by a car, things go on as normal. Life doesn’t stop for a small creature who flickered out like a candle.
I supermarket and prepare for the new puppy coming home, her adoption finalised before the loss of her playmate-to-be. I fill my partner in on what I bought and he looks at me –
‘You get over dogs fast.’
Tears fill my eyes and suddenly I am angry, because no. I don’t get over things. I just don’t cry, or wail, or gnash my teeth.
I want to scream and yell
My grandmother died 13 months ago and I’ve cried twice. Twice for a great yawning hole that opened in my heart. There was no time to fall apart then, there is no time now. What makes you think I don’t feel it, just because I’m not screaming?
Instead. I say
‘I don’t get over it. I just get on with it.’
***
Losing one dog is unlucky, surely twice is carelessness. We are berated for the things we didn’t do correctly, or should have done instead. Everyone has 20/20 hindsight.
***
Unpacking the groceries and the thud of another grave being dug vibrates through my footsteps.
Milk
thud
Cheese
thud
Collar
thud
Make my son a bottle and put him to bed. Make my daughter something to eat. Wipe the counters.
thud.
Until we all stand around a grave and solemnly put the dirt back from whence it came.
Again.
Comments
13 responses to “Once is unlucky, twice is carelessness.”
Oh sweetheart. I’m so so sorry.
Aww hon. *hugs*
I’m the same as you. When a pet goes I feel sad, even guilty, but I get on with it quickly because I have to. x
It’s hard and you do have to get on with it. It’s what we ‘strong’ women do and you my friend are one of the strongest.
Hugs to you.
who ever berated you might not have realised it but was upset to as we all are because no matter how you look at it orhow long you have an animal for they will always be part of the familyand when something happens it is upsetting but we do get on with life .
Hugs and more hugs to you….after losing our two beagles last year, who says our animals are not part of the family…xxxx
Oh darling heart, we will go down and get a fruit tree for her. xxx
and chocolate for you
Dogs – any pet – are family. If they are not, then you never really realise or appreciate the only truly unconditional love in a world full of uncertainty and shifting opinions. To me, he was never ‘just a dog’.
I’m very sorry you lost this member of your family xx
[…] Seven died the other day. She followed our neighbour’s car onto the road and was hit by a car coming the other way. A stupid accident, a stupid mistake. Unlike Susie, this one wasn’t preventable, as Seven was an escape artist extraordinaire. […]
So sorry to hear that 🙁
I got teary at this. Losing pets is so hard. I’m one of those people who would get another pet very soon after a loss. It wouldn’t be because I “got over it”, it’s that it would bring some joy into the home and help everyone deal with the pain. Call it a transference of love…or something! Sorry for your loss.
I am sorry Ms V.
From someone who loves her adopted greyhound ex racer as much as life itself…
Mim