Blogging is a public space

It’s quiet over here. The silence and empty pages fill the room. Untouched, I haven’t yet gotten around to filling this space with words.

Eventually it will become full. I’ll walk in here and hear a familiar babble of sounds. My fingers on the keyboard and my voice echoing quietly throughout. I’ll tell stories and maybe someone will stop by to listen to me, to read what I’ve got to say. I’m not sure how that makes me feel anymore.

It used to be, once upon a time I blogged for myself, but also for my audience. I updated my blog often with amusing anecdotes and stories about the children. Journalling myself for them later.

Now I find myself needing something for myself. To move away from my blog persona of Sleepless Nights and move towards myself, Veronica Foale.

It scares me a little, putting my name out onto the Internet for anyone to find. Before this I enjoyed a thin veneer of anonymity. As my veneer grew ever thinner, my frustrations with the limits of my space there grew.

I want somewhere, just for me.

People say, write about whatever you want to write about, we’ll still read. Go silent, we’ll be here when you come back. Cry, we’ll hold your hand.

It’s not as easy as all that though. Sleepless Nights, while not well known on the Internet, is well known within my family and in-laws alike. Sometimes I wonder how they see me, that blog persona who was very similar but also very different to who they saw in real life. Do they wonder where I hide my words when they’re with me? I hope not.

I’m a writer. I need to write. I’m driven to write. I’ve got so many words burbling about inside of me, begging to be let free that I need to open the tap and let them out sometimes.

I like Sleepless Nights.

I also like Veronica Foale.

And until I can work out how to mesh the two of them together, they’ll remain separate.

I think I’m going to enjoy this.